You Haven't Even Begun
by CharmedGirl
Summary: BtVS/AtS crossover. Angel returns to Sunnydale to help Buffy. B/A
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Angel or Buffy characters. Ya know, I'm not sure why people put this because it's OBVIOUS these are not my characters if they're not under original stuffs but whatever. I don't use these for profit... blah blah blah.  
  
A/N: Set in Buffy Season 6, Angel Season 3. Willow and Tara are not together anymore, Willow is not using magic anymore because she's addicted to it, Buffy's with Spike, and for the sake of my fic everyone knows about Buffy and Spike. I don't know much about Angel, I've only seen a few episodes. It's the same time period as Buffy though. But I will note that Angel has a son, Connor. The mother is Darla, in case you didn't know any of this.  
  
On to da fic:  
  
  
Angel sighed. There had been few cases recently and he had nothing to do but watch little Connor sleep. The phone rang and Cordelia picked it up. Finally, Angel thought. Someone to help, something to do. Take his mind off that face that was haunting his dreams so recently. That blond girl, that strong, courageous, beautiful woman.  
"It's Buffy," Cordelia said, shaken. Speak of the devil, Angel thought.  
"Well it's not her," Cordelia corrected. "It's Giles. Buffy is hurt. She-she's in a coma. A vamp bit her and drained her of most of her blood. Not enough to kill her, because Tara and Willow got there in time. But... they're not sure if she'll make it." Angel stood, stricken. He had seen this scene, so many times before in those dreams. Buffy hurt, Angel saving her, them living happily forever. He tried to forget them and didn't think twice about them. But now that it was a reality... It was just too real for his taste.  
Angel stood up, having reached a decision.  
"Where are you going?" Cordelia asked.  
"Where else? Sunnydale."  
  
"How is she?" Dawn asked tentively. Willow stood next to Buffy, so pale and stricken, stroking her hair.   
"The same," Willow said. "No better, no worse." Willow had been watching over Buffy night and day since she had gotten hurt. The other scoobies came everyday to see how she was. Dawn was there most of the time, except when she had school and had to sleep.   
Dawn kissed Buffy on the head.   
"Please be ok," Dawn whispered. Willow quietly left the room so Dawn could have a moment alone with Buffy.  
"I need you," she continued. "We all do. We're lost without you. Willow's all fragile and freaking out that she can't do anything, Tara isn't sure how to react and has been disappearing, Xander's trying to ignore it and forget about it because he's scared, Anya's doing her best to keep a level-head, but even she's falling apart. And Giles, well..." Dawn sighed. "You're like a daughter to him. His slayer. He's devastated and is rushing through all these books to find a cure. I've never seen him like this. I'm scared Buffy. I can't live without you." Dawn began to cry. No response was given as the beeping of the heart moniter seemed to engulf Dawn. Willow entered the room again and wrapped Dawn up again as tears poured from their eyes.  
  
"You can't just go to Sunnydale!" Wesley exclaimed. Angel had done his best to leave but Cordelia stopped him. Didn't they understand what Buffy meant to him?  
"Why not?" Angel said. "Buffy's hurt and could die. I can't just sit around like this waiting to see if it happens or not."  
"She died before and you didn't go over there," Cordelia `helpfully' added.  
"I didn't know about it then, only until after she was resurrected. And I DID see her after that." Wesley and Cordelia still seemed doubtful.  
"Look, Buffy means the world and more to me. She's the reason I don't walk into the sunlight. She's the reason I am still here, and doing what I do. If she's gone, than I cease to exist. Even if I'm not her boyfriend, that doesn't mean I can't be her friend. I need to be there if--" Angel winced. No if. She WOULD wake up. She had to. "WHEN she wakes up. Whether you like it or not I'm going."  
"I'm going too." Wesley and Angel looked at Cordelia in shock.  
"What? She's my friend too. Besides, it'll be nice to see the ol' Sunnydale gang again. And maybe I'll have a visoin that helps or something." It did make sense to Angel and Wesley.  
"All right then. Wesley, you take care of Connor. You and Gunn and Fred can handle the work. We'll be back when we can."   
  
  
"Giles." Willow entered the Magic Box. It looked as if he had passed out, but no, he was reading.  
"Willow." In alarm he sat up. "Was there any change? Is she--" Giles gulped. Dead was what was about to come out, but it was just too morbid. She wouldn't die, she couldn't.  
"No," Willow reassured him. "Xander forced me to leave. I've been there all week. Find anything?"  
"A few spells that would help heal her, but nothing that will awaken her."   
"Ok. I'll help you lo..." Willow's body collapsed into a chair.  
"Willow, Willow!" Giles shouted, shaking her.   
  
"Good old Sunnydale." They had arrived, finally. Every second had seemed like an eternity, something Angel would know about.  
"Oh can we go to the Bronze?" Cordelia asked anxiously. "I haven't seen that place in ages!" Seeing the look on Angel's face she said "All right, fine. But when Buffy wakes up we are going. You won't be able to stop me." Angel chuckled.  
"Wouldn't dream of it."  
  
"How is she?" Xander asked.  
"She's fine. They said it was a lack of food, water, sleep, etc. She really does need some rest," Giles said, pulling the hair back from Willow's face. "She'll be fine, just needs her sleep. She'll be up and about, ready to awaken Buffy in no time. Speaking of..." Giles cleared his throat. "Any change at all?"  
"No. She looks so peaceful, resting there. God I hope she wakes up soon."  
"As do I," Giles said. "As does everyone."  
  
"So where to?" Cordelia asked.  
"Sunnydale General. Buffy." Into the night they drove, past the shadowy figures and lonesome shapes. Angel ignored everyone outside of him. All that mattered was Buffy. All that ever mattered was her. She had to be ok. He had to know that she'd always be there for him, as would he always be there for her.  
"You still love her." A small accusation, yet for some reason it lit a fire under Angel.  
"I'll always love her! She's my only love. But I'm not in love with her. Just because I dream of her doesn't make me IN love with her! What do you know?" Cordelia was surprised at Angel's outburst.  
"I know... that's what I meant," Cordelia said, worried about Angel. "Is everything ok?"  
"Buffy, the best thing that ever happened to me, is in a coma and might never wake up. I'm a vampire with a soul, and... oh yeah. I have no reflection, which really makes it hard to shave. I'm just peachy." Angel continued to drive on with Cordelia in silence.   
"She'll be ok, you know. Buffy's a fighter. She wouldn't leave you or Sunnydale. She'll make it."  
"She better," Angel whispered.  
  
HA CLIFFHANGER!!! I love leaving these. Please give feedback! If you don't give feedback I won't write another chapter! Who am I kidding, of course I will. But please review!!! 


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Ok, PLEEZ review. Of course I'm getting ahead of myself... I just posted the first chapter a few minutes ago. But I must add more, so please review!   
  
  
"Angel, where am I?" White mist swirled around her, whipping her blond hair around her face. The wind gushed past her and almost took her with it.  
"You are here."   
"Helpful much?" Why was Angel... here? Where was here? Buffy had no idea. The last thing she knew was fighting that vampire. She gasped. Could she be... in heaven? But it didn't seem like heaven. Or at least how she imagined it. No, it was too empty. And why would Angel be in heaven? Unless...  
"You didn't die did you?" Buffy asked.  
"You think you know... what's to come...what you are. You haven't even begun..." And with that he whisped away.   
"Angel!" But he was gone, as quickly as he had come. Why did that sound so familiar? `And yet you haven't even begun' or something like that. What did it mean?  
"WHY AM I HERE?" She yelled at the sky... or at least up. Was it even a sky? But the answer she wanted wasn't there. Angel reappeared.  
"Does it matter? I'm here with you. Forever we'll be together." He locked her into a kiss.  
  
...You haven't even begun....the words tumbled through her mind as the kiss grew more passionate.  
  
  
"Are we there yet?" Cordelia asked for the tenth time.  
"Am I getting out of the car?" Angel took two sharp left turns and opened the car door.  
"Now we're here." Yes, they had made it to the dreaded destination. Sunnydale General. Swinging open the doors they walked in. Nobody. There were plenty of doctors, nurses, sick people and all, but no one they recognized.  
"Angel, are you sure this is the right hospital?" Cordelia asked.  
"Of course I'm sure! They didn't know I was coming, that's all. She's got to be somewhere around here." Angel approached the desk.  
"Do you know where Buffy Summer's room is?" he asked. Before he could respond he heard a voice.  
"Angel." Not who he would have most wanted to meet him, but it would do.  
"Xander. How is she?"  
"What are you doing here? How did you know she was hurt?" Xander asked, puzzled.  
"Giles called me to tell me that she had been hurt. Is she ok?"   
"No change. Just sleeping so peacefully." He seemed to notice Cordelia for the first time. "Cordy."  
"Xander," Cordelia said business-like.  
"Where's Giles, Willow, all of them?" Angel asked worriedly.  
"Giles is looking for something to heal her, Anya, my fiancee," he glanced over at Cordelia to see how she reacted, "is with him, Dawn is at Gile's house, sleeping, Spike can't come inside the hospital because he's afraid some doctor would notice his lack of breathing but he'll probably return later." Angel was too preoccupied with Xander's lack of mentioning Willow to notice Xander referring to a friendship almost between Spike and Buffy.  
"What about Willow?"  
"Tara's with her. Willow... she was so stressed out about Buffy and she had a lack of fluids, foods, rest, etc., and so she fainted. She's resting now, but she'll be fine."  
"Can I see her?" Xander looked at him curiously.  
"It's just easier to see Willow now then Buffy. Can I see her?"  
"Sure, just turn left 3 times and a right. Door 139." Angel hurried off towards Willow's room, leaving Xander and Cordelia awkwardly alone.  
  
Door 139. He opened it quietly, in fear of waking her up. No Tara inside, whoever she was. It was empty, except for the small red-headed girl. He walked over to her, wondering what he was doing. Angel sat on a nearby chair, holding her hand.  
"A-Angel?" Willow asked, her eyes blurry.  
"Willow, I'm sorry I didn't mean to awake you," Angel apologized.  
"What happened? Last think I remember I was in the Magic Box with Giles and then..." she gestured around, "here."  
"I'm not sure exactly," Angel began to explain, "but Xander said you fainted from the stress of Buffy and not eating or drinking or sleeping. Giles called about Buffy earlier and so here I am."   
"How's Buffy? Is she ok? I'm such a horrible friend, fainting when she's in a coma. Oh god, what if she d-" Willow began to cry. "What if she's worse. Oh this is all my fault!" Tears began to pour out of her eyes.  
"Shh, shhh," Angel said, pulling her into a hug. It felt odd at first, but he began to relax.  
"Who a-are you?" someone stuttered from the doorway. Angel gently set the weeping Willow down and walked over to the woman.  
"You're Tara?" he asked, on a hunch. She nodded. "Angel." Tara walked over to Willow and held her tight, like Angel had been doing. Angel, feeling awkward, exited the room.  
  
"Why am I here, of all places?" Buffy wondered. The white wispy place of peace was gone, and now she was at...no, impossible.  
"High school," she whispered. It had burned down at Graduation but now it was up and bustling. Why was she here? Why was this happening to her? Everything was just so confusing. She was in college... well she had been. But she definitely wasn't in high school. Dawn was in high school, but not her.  
"Willow!" She ran after a recently spotted Willow. Willow didn't stop, she just walked faster.  
"Willow!" Buffy called again. No response.  
"You haven't yet begun..." Someone was holding her, but it wasn't a vampire. At lest not a dangerous one.   
"Angel, what's going on?" Buffy asked. He kissed her, and then let go, dissappearing into trees.  
  
"Spike?" Giles walked in tentively. "Spike?"  
"What do you bloody want?" he asked grumpily.  
"You should come," Giles said gently.  
"Why? Did something happen? Is something wrong?" Spike began to panic.  
"No, it's just... when she wakes up I think she'd like to see you first." Spike shook his head.  
"No, it's not a good idea."  
"She loves you, you know," Giles said. "It'd mean a lot to her I'm sure." Spike rolled his eyes and reluctantly followed Giles out the door.  
  
"Dawn!" Buffy ran towards her.  
"What." Dawn seemed mad at Buffy, but at least she was talking to her.  
"Dawn what's happening?"  
"Why do you care at all? All you care about it your slaying, or your new boyfriend." She began to imitate Buffy. "OMG my boyfriend's a vampire, I have to slay him.. but I LOVE him! OMG my boyfriend's in the Initiative. Oh no, he's being called away! What do I do when I still love Angel? OMG my new boyfriend is a vampire too, but he doesn't have a soul! And I don't know if I really love him! And what about Angel? And Riley's married! Oh no!"  
"Dawn! What's wrong with you?"  
"It's not like you really care."  
"Of course I care! You're my sister!"  
"No you don't! If you cared you wouldn't have left me! You never care about me! You left me all alone and I'm scared! Buffy, help!" Dawn began to cry.  
"Dawn, I never left you." Dawn just cried harder. "Dawn!" But her shouts seemed to become quieter. And soon he holding her again. The man that had been disappearing and reappearing all through this nightmare.  
"We could be happy..." Angel said.  
"What are you talking about? WHY AM I HERE?" Buffy shouted through her tears.  
"We could be forever. But you never cared about me. You wouldn't have let me leave if you cared."  
"What? No! Angel..." She looked helplessly at him. "I'm scared Angel. What's happening to me?" He held her close.  
"As long as you're with me I don't care about anything else." Buffy kissed him, but soon all she felt on her lips was air. He was gone again.  
  
A/N: REVIEW!!!!! ^-^ Feedback please! 


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Feedback!   
  
"She just looks so tiny." Spike kissed her forehead. "Looks a bit paler than some vamps I know."  
"I know. She's been like this a week." A whole long week without the slayer. Without Buffy. It was too hard to imagine any longer without her.  
"I need to get back to my research," Giles said, and quickly left the room. Being with her was too hard. Seeing her like that... it was unbearable. Wrapped up in his thoughts, he didn't watch where he was going and crashed into a tall, brooding man.  
"I'm so sorry sir..." Giles squinted at the figure. "Angel?"  
"Where's Buffy?" he asked.  
"Angel, I didn't know you were coming."  
"I couldn't just leave her here without being here with her."  
"She's just over there, room 213." Giles said. "But--" Angel walked off without hearing Gile's last words.  
"Spike's there."  
  
Buffy walked along the deserted road, kicking some pebbles.  
"Angel!" she shouted. "I know you're going to come out sometime. Can you please just tell me where I am and why you're with me?" Angel appeared before her, startling her.  
"You don't want to be with me?" he asked.  
"Of course I want to be with you. When you're with me you're the only thing I want to see, the only thing I want to be with." She kissed him lightly. "But please tell me what I'm here for so I can go home." Angel's shaped became distorted and suddenly transformed into...  
"Spike."  
  
Angel paced in front of her door. Why couldn't he go inside? What was so painful about it? Deep down he knew though. I'm a big man, he thought. Why can't I just handle this one girl. Of course the girl was Buffy, and who could handle her? He gathered up his courage and walked inside to see Spike kissing Buffy's hand.  
"You." The hatred burning in his eyes mirrored that of Spike's eyes.  
"And you."  
"Why are you here with Buffy? Are you some kind of pervert who goes around kissing girls in comas?"  
"Don't you live in L.A.?" Spike asked. "Couldn't tear yourself away could you? Still in love with her..."  
"I'm not in love with her! And why are you here?" Spike smirked.  
"A boyfriend has a right to be with his girlfriend." Angel laughed.  
"Like I'm supposed to believe you're her boyfriend."  
"I am. Ask Xander or Willow or Dawn. Anyone. She's mine." Angel gaped at him. "That's right, I'm hers and she's mine."  
  
"So you've been cheating on me." Spike accused.  
"What? No! I just need to get out of here!" Buffy exclaimed. "Help me, please!"  
"When you've been kissing another man? I don't think so."  
"Spike, just help me leave and I'll explain everything. Just get me out of this nightmare."  
"How do you know it's not reality? This could be as real as you and me."  
"Please Spike."  
"You still love him, don't you."  
"Spike, it's not the time."  
"I can't compete with him. You'll always love him the most. He'll always have you're heart."  
"I love you Spike."  
"But not as much as you love him."  
Buffy looked down.  
"I'm right, you know I am and so does everyone else." Angel appeared behind her.  
"He's right. You're still in love with me."  
"Stop!" Buffy shouted, not being able to take it. They disappeared along with the setting. She heard something clink onto the floor as she saw her surroundings. She was in Angel's mansion. Again she heard something drop onto the ground. She turned to see a ring.  
"The Claddagh Ring," she whispered.  
  
"Get out of here, you don't belong here," Spike said.  
"Neither do you."  
"I need time with her. Alone."  
"I do too. You get to see her all the time. Just let me have 5 minutes."  
"5 minutes is all you get," Spike said, glaring back at him. "But remember... she's mine." He walked away.  
"Buffy," Angel sighed. He held her hand, the one that hadn't been kissed by Spike. Angel stroked her face. "Where are you inside of there? Come out for me, please. Giles and Xander and Willow all need you. Dawn needs her sister. Even Spike needs you." He paused. "I need you. I always need you. Cordelia's right. I do still love you." He began to cry. Suddenly he heard something drop on the floor.  
"The Claddagh Ring," he whispered, seeing it on the ground  
  
A/N: Cliffie! Anyways, please review!!! ^-^ I know this chap was short, but I'll try to add a lot more stuff tomorrow. 


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thanks to da BLOB for reviewing. Please everyone REVIEW!!! I live on reviews, lol. ^_^ Reviewing makes me add more chapters faster. So please review!!!  
  
  
Buffy walked over to the ring. She hadn't seen it for so long. Angel kept it and gave it to her whenever they saw each other. She fingered it in her hands.  
'The hands represent friendship, the crown represents loyalty... and the heart... Well, you know... Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody.' She smiled, remembering when Angel had given it to her. She put it on her finger, pointing the heart out.  
  
Angel picked the Claddagh ring up. What was it doing on the ground, over there? He always had them with him, and yet now... He looked around his neck. There was Buffy's, hanging on that string. But his... it wasn't on his finger like it usually was. It had somehow gone on the ground. He looked at it. Friendship, loyalty, and love. He put it back on, with the heart pointing out. He didn't belong to anyone, certaintly not Buffy. Angel lifted the ring off his neck and placed it on Buffy's finger, tearing the string away, pointing the heart out like his. Maybe they didn't belong to each other anymore, but they still loved each other. Not in love... more like a deep friendship, one that surpassed all other levels.   
"You're time is up." Spike reentered the room loudly.  
"Let me have just a bit longer. Let me be with her." Spike smirked.  
"Yeah, I'm going to leave you with her. That's likely," Spike said.  
"You have her all the time! I never get to see her!"  
"And who's fault is that? Besides, she is my girl now. You had your chance."  
"Could you two kindly exit this room?" Buffy's doctor interrupted them. "You're making too much noise. Buffy needs her peace." The two reluctantly exited the room, glaring at each other.  
  
Buffy sat on Angel's bed in the mansion, staring at the ring, twirling it around her finger.  
"The heart's pointing the wrong way," a voice said.   
"Angel." He simply smiled at her. "Why do you keep appearing?"  
"This isn't my world. It's yours. You choose who's here. You want me and I'm here."  
"The heart is pointing the right way," Buffy said.  
"You belong to Spike don't you?" Angel asked. Buffy hesitated.  
"I don't know. I mean, he loves me and I love... being with him but I don't know if I BELONG to him. I'm just confused."   
"You need to decide. Do you belong to him? Or are you just using him?"  
"I love him."  
"Do you love him more than me?"  
"WOULD YOU STOP ASKING ME THAT? JUST STOP OK! I COULDN'T NEVER POSSIBLY LOVE ANYONE MORE THAN YOU! You're my first love, my only love. Anyone else is just a distraction for me. I need you and I can't be without you. You're the only thing that matters. Knowing you're out there keeps me going. I'll never love anyone more than you, but there's nothing I can do about that, can I?" Tears were poured out of Buffy eyes. Angel reached down and held her close. They rocked back and forth in his dark room on his bed.  
  
"May I speak with you?" Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara, Spike, Angel, Dawn, and Giles all sat in the waiting room, hoping for news of Buffy getting better. They looked up at the sound of Buffy's doctor. Giles looked around and when no one made a move to get up, he walked into Buffy's room with the doctor.  
"We're worried about her. She's been showing no progress and--"  
"But she hasn't been worsening," Giles cut him off.  
"True, but she still hasn't been improving."  
"I've noticed," Giles said harshly.  
"We just wanted you to know that it's not likely she'll survive. She lost too much of her blood to walk up fine and unscathed."  
"Buffy's a fighter," Giles said, in the same harsh tone. "If anyone can make it, she can. I haven't lost faith in her." He turned away and walked back to the scoobies.  
  
"Angel, I don't know what's happening to me," Buffy said after a few minutes of hugging.  
"This is you're world. Exit it and you'll be back where you need to."  
"Angel, what do you mean?" He didn't respond and seemed to fade. Not only him, actually, everything was fading, and she found herself hurling through the same white mist whe had previously seen.  
"Welcome," a man said, as she arrived on a cloud-type thing.  
"What am I doing here? WHY CAN'T I JUST GO HOME?" she cried.  
"This is..." the man began, gesturing behind her. But he didn't need to continue. She knew.  
"Heaven."  
  
A/N: I know it's so short... but I promise for a lot more soon. IF YOU REVIEW!!! So please review!!! 


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thanks to the reviews. Must remind you, PLEASE REVIEW!!! ^_^  
  
  
Spike and Angel sat opposite from one another, each holding one of Buffy's hands and glaring at each other. Occasionally Spike would do something like kiss her hand, and then Angel would kiss her forehead, and then Spike would kiss her. But it was mostly just silence.  
"You're in there somewhere," Angel whispered. "But where?"  
He squeezed her hand comfortingly. At least it would have been comforting if she was awake.  
Buffy's pulse began to quicken.  
"What's happening?" Spike asked, alarmed.  
"Don't ask me, it's not as if I have a heartbeat!" Angel shouted. "Doctor, someone!"  
"What's wrong?" Dawn asked, coming in and looking terrified.  
"Go get a doctor now!" Angel shouted. Dawn raced off. Moments later a doctor came and ushered them out of the room.  
  
"I wish I knew what was happening," Angel said.  
"We all do," Giles said, holding Dawn.  
"Excuse me? I need to speak to someone about her... condition." A doctor walked up to them. They all looked at Giles. He sighed and followed the doctor into Buffy's room once more.  
"She... we tried our best," the doctor said. Giles looked up in alarm.  
"What do you mean by best?" he asked.  
"She's gone."  
  
"I'm not supposed to be here," Buffy said to the Welcomer.  
"And yet you are," he replied.  
"No. I haven't saved everyone I could have saved. I haven't found a true love. Well I have but I didn't die happy. I couldn't say goodbye to Xander or Anya or Tara or Willow or Giles or Spike or Dawn or," her voice cracked, "Angel. I need them, and they need me. You can't expect me to leave them. I couldn't do that. We need each other and don't you dare think of ever changing that." Tears poured out of her eyes.  
"It was not I who killed you. You brought this upon yourself. You got yourself killed."  
"No, the vampire killed me. I just happened to be in it's way. You can't take me away from my friends and Dawn. You can't do this."  
"Again, I'm not doing this. This is how the world works."  
"Well I'm not going to let it."  
  
"Giles?" Willow asked the crying Watcher as he returned from Buffy's room. He wiped his eyes.  
"What?"  
"What's wrong Giles. Is Buffy...is she..." Giles just cried harder. "Oh no, Giles." Her voice began to tighten. "What's wrong? What's happened?"  
"Buffy, sh-she..." he swallowed, unable to say it. How hard it was to get that one word out. "She died." Willow fell onto the floor, tears pouring out.  
"No! This isn't supposed to happen! Buffy can't go, we can't be without her! We-we'll just do the resurrection spell again." Willow said.  
"Willow, no. It won't work on someone a second time," Tara said softly.  
Dawn sat in shock.  
"Buffy's gone?" she asked timidly.  
"Yes," Xander said. "And this time..." he paused, tears constricting his voice. "She won't be coming back."  
  
"You can't stop this from happening!" the Welcomer exclaimed. "You're staying here."  
"You know, I just don't see that happening," Buffy said.  
"You're going in there, and you won't be returning to them! They already know you're dead and you're going to stay that way!"  
"You can't stop me," Buffy said.  
"I can to," the Welcomer protested, "And you are not returning!"  
"Just watch me." Buffy punched the Welcomer and then roundhouse kicked him. He lay on the cloud, groaning in pain. "How'd you like that?"  
Suddenly some official looking people took her arms and dragged her towards the city.  
"What... no! I'M NOT STAYING HERE! I NEED MY FRIENDS AND MY SISTER AND I NEED ANGEL! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!" She cried.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Spike asked harshly. He had been holding Buffy's hand in his, crying for hours.  
"The same as you. I have a right to see her," Angel said.  
"Go away! Isn't enough you were her only true love? Isn't it enough that whenever I was with her I knew deep down in her heart it was always you she loved, not me? That she was just using me to forget about you? Can't I just be with her for a few minutes without you around her or in her mind? It's all I ask!" Tears poured out of Spike's eyes. Angel was shocked. Spike crying was just odd to him... something that he thought would never happen. But it was Buffy, it was all about her. Who couldn't love her gorgeous blond hair and bright, shining eyes? Certaintly not him.   
Angel sat down across from Spike, holding Buffy's other hand just like they had right before she had died. Right before her heart had quickened and the doctor had shoved them out.  
"I love her too, you know."  
"Of course you do. That's why I don't want you anywhere near her. She was mine, for a short while. And I got to pretend that I was all she thought about, that I was her true love." Angel looked down as silence surrounded them.  
  
  
A/N: Please review!!!! I'll try to add the next chapter as soon as I can. 


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Ok I NEED reviews so if you read my fic, please review it!!! ^_^  
  
  
The officials shoved Buffy into a dark room with only one barred window.  
"What is this place?" Buffy shouted out to them. Suddenly it dawned on her. "What are you guys, sick? You have jails in heaven???" No one responded.  
"Don't I at least get one phone call?" she shouted. The door opened.  
"You will speak to him in an hour. He's busy now," a guard said.  
"Who?" Buffy asked.  
"God."  
  
"How could she die?" Dawn cried. Giles held her tighter. "She was the strongest! Mom already left me, how could she leave me too?"  
  
Buffy looked out the window, realizing it didn't look out on the Heaven City but out on Earth. And in Sunnydale she could see little Dawn crying her heart out.  
  
"She was everything to me! Doesn't she know how much I need her? How lost I am without her?"  
  
"Dawn," Buffy whispered, trying to reach her. But no, she was too far away.  
  
"I loved her so much, but I never let her know. She never knew how I really felt." Tears poured out so hard that it was impossible for her to speak. Still, she managed to utter a few final words. "I loved her.  
"We all did," Xander said. "How could you not?"  
  
"He's ready to see you," the guard said, returning. Buffy quietly said goodbye to her friends as she wiped her tears from her eyes and walked out.  
  
"She's not going to wake up," Angel said sadly. Spike grunted something resembling "I know."  
"It's useless to continue sitting here with her. Sitting with each other, something we definitely don't want."  
"Then why aren't you leaving?" Spike asked.  
"I could never leave her."   
"That's a laugh!" Spike said. "You've left her countless times."  
"I can't leave her like this," Angel said harshly. "She's everything to me."  
"She's everything to everyone," Spike said softly.  
  
"Why do you feel you're more special than the others?" a great figure asked.  
"Excuse me?" Buffy asked, askanse.  
"You seem to feel that you deserve to live while the others don't. Why."  
"I don't know about the others, but I didn't deserve to die. I've done everything for you guys, saved a lot of lives that would be here if I wasn't there. I never got to say goodbye to Dawn or my friends, and I never got to see Angel for a last time. I need to see them, I need to be with them. They need me too. And the world needs me. I need to go back. It's not my time," Buffy said.  
"I don't think it's your decision when you get to die."  
"It's more mine then yours. It is my life after all."  
  
"OMG the Bronze was just like when I left it!" Cordelia exclaimed, returning from the Bronze. She had left a few hours before Buffy had died.  
"Who died?" Cordelia asked, seeing all their faces. They began to cry more. "Oh. How long ago?"  
"8 hours ago," Xander said.  
"Where's Angel?" Cordelia asked.  
"He's with Spike and Buffy."  
"He does know she's dead right?" Cordelia asked.  
"Yeah, I think that came up," Xander said. "He just needs closure."  
  
"You can't go back there," the figure said.  
"Why not? The world needs me and it owes me. I've saved your asses plenty of times. How many times have I averted the apocolypse? I did everything for your world, and now you owe me. Send me back."  
"You've cheated death before. You can't do it again."  
"Ok, just listen to me. I've helped you, I've helped the world. I've saved millions of people and killed thousands of evil beings. I'm needed by them and my friends. My friends can't live without me, but more importantly I can't be without them. They're everything to me and wihtout them I can't feel, I can't breathe, I can't do anything. I need to be with them. I saw them, they were falling apart. I need to be with Dawn to help her through the rest of her teens. Giles needs me to be his Slayer and daughter in a sense. Anya and Tara need me there too for support. Xander and Willow need me as their best friend. Dawn needs me as her sister, her only family in the world. Only person she feels cares anymore. Spike needs me as the only person who's ever loved him. And Angel needs me to be his first love, his everything. And I need them more than they need me. Please let me go back!" The tears she had been trying to hold back began to pour as she cried harder and harder.  
"I'm sorry, but as convincing as you are, we cannot let you go back!" Buffy was captured by her tears as she looked at the Claddagh ring that was still on her finger.  
'You think you know, what you are, what's to come. You haven't even begun.' Angel's words rang through her head.  
"No. I will not take that as an answer. You send me back now."  
"We can't do that!" the figure yelled.  
"I don't care. I'm going back." She wiped the tears away. "You think you know, what you are, what's to come. You haven't even begun," she said. "I'm going back. I'm needed, so I'll be there, and you can't do anything about it." A bright light shone over them and suddenly Buffy felt herself being lifted away.  
  
Angel stared at her beautiful face. It was so perfect, even when she was...dead. Spike and Angel both sat crying, something Angel thought he'd never do. They were allies, just for a moment. Buffy was enough to bring the greatest of enemies together. And then destroy the evil inside them.  
Angel looked at the Claddagh ring on his finger. She would never have a chance to be his. Not that he would have had a chance before, when she was alive, but at least she would be able to turn him down. He jerked his eyes to her head. Did her eyelid flutter? No, it was nothing. Buffy made a sound, a small moan. Angel looked wide-eyed at Spike.  
"Did you hear that?" he asked, shocked. Spike nodded slowly. The continued staring at Buffy's face as she moved slightly.  
"Angel," she croaked. And then she did the unthinkable. She opened her eyes.  
"Angel!" she called once again.  
  
A/N: I could never kill Buffy! Please review and I'll put up the next part... on Monday because I'm going away for the weekend. Please review!!!!!! ^-^ 


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! Please continue to review!!!  
  
  
"Buffy?" Angel asked, hoping it wasn't a dream.  
She sat herself up and looked around the room.  
"Angel." She smiled happily and got up.  
"Buffy, no, lay down. You just returned from the dead, you need your sleep." Buffy ignored Angel and walked over to him. They stared at each other for a moment, and then Buffy hugged him.  
"Hey!" Spike protested, but he was grinning as widely as Angel and Buffy. Suddenly Buffy pulled away, her grin disappearing.  
"Where's Dawn?"  
  
"Dawn!" Buffy shouted. Dawn's ears perked up. That woman sounded like Buffy. But no, it was impossible. Buffy was dead.  
"Dawn!" Buffy called again. Dawn turned her head to the voice, expecting to be let down again. Her eyes widened.  
"Buffy!" The group looked towards where Dawn was staring at. Buffy ran over to Dawn, holding her close.  
"I'm so sorry," she whispered into Dawn's ear. "And I did know. I know you love me, just as I hope you know I love you." Angel and Spike appeared into the waiting room, having followed Buffy out. Buffy finally let go of Dawn.  
"What?... How?" Giles asked, perplexed. Buffy smiled at her Watcher and pulled him into a hug too.  
"She awoke," Spike said.  
"Yes, we can see that," Xander said. Buffy looked over to Xander.  
"Xander!" She began to hug him.  
"All of you might as well hug her now," Angel said. "Otherwise nothing will get done." The others crowded around Buffy and hugged her. As they pulled apart Giles reiterated his question.  
"How did this happen? No one did any spells did they?" They shook their heads.  
"I came back by myself." They stared at her. "I did! First I was in this odd place, and An--" She cut herself off. Better not to mention her numberous dreams of him and her together, kissing. "And others were there. And then everything faded and I was sent up there. I didn't want to be there so I demanded to come back. They said no, I said yes, some being sent me back here."  
"This is astonishing," Giles said. "The enourmous will you must have had to bring yourself back."  
"It was different than last time. Last time it was just peace. Now it was a real place and city. Why was it different?"  
"Only one can imagine. Different circumstances I'd suppose. The first time you died to save Dawn, and to stop Glory. You dived into that other dimension. This time a vampire killed you," Giles said. Buffy's eyes hardened.  
"I need to get that vampire. He killed me, and now I'm going to return the favor," she said, standing up.  
"Buffy no," Angel said.   
"You're not the boss of me! I have my duties, and I think any vampire that can kill me is a threat!"  
"He's right," Willow said. "You're in no condition to go fight vampires!"  
"Giles..." She looked to him for help.  
"No. We'll talk tomorrow, but now you need your sleep. And we need to figure out how to explain your awakening."  
  
"Home sweet home," Buffy said, smiling at her house. The doctors at the hospital had been puzzled in how she could be dead for 9 or 10 hours, and then reawaken feeling fine and having 100% health. But they had cleared her to leave and she had finally been able to return home.  
"I'm glad you're back," Dawn said happily.  
"Trust me, so am I."  
  
"Buffy."  
"Angel," she whispered, seeing his figure in the doorway. She had been looking over her things and thinking how happy she was to be back that she had forgotten all about him.  
"We need to talk," he began.  
"About what?"  
"Why did you wake up and say my name?" he asked.  
"I-I woke up, I saw you, you're supposed to be in L.A., not Sunndale, naturally I was surprised," Buffy answered awkwardly.  
"You said my name, you opened your eyes and said my name, you sat up, saw me, said my name," Angel corrected.  
Buffy shook her head. "It was nothing, really," she insisted.  
"I think it was," he said.  
"Why are you still here?" she asked, ignoring him. "I'm fine, I'm awake. Go back to L.A."  
"You want me to leave?"  
"No. Yes! I'm not sure..." Buffy sighed. "I don't know what to do. I'm just confused."  
"I'll leave next week," Angel said. "But if there's anything you have to tell me..."  
"You think you know, what you are, what's to come. You haven't even begun," she said as he was leaving her room.  
"What?" he asked, reentering. She took a deep breath.  
"You told me that. Before heaven, while I was in my coma. I saw you a few times, and you told me that. Right before I was brought back, I remembered those words, and said them. That's why I said your name. And the Claddagh ring..." Buffy added quietly.  
"The Claddagh ring?" Angel asked.  
"One of the places I was was...your mansion. I found the ring and put it on. It's nothing important. I also saw Dawn and Willow briefly," she said. "You being in my dreams was nothing."  
"I put the Claddagh ring on your finger," Angel said. "It's your choice which way it's turned."  
"Angel, I'm with Spike. I'm not sure if you knew..."  
"He let me know, loud and clear. Just tell me this, did you see him in your dream."  
"Sort of," she said. He nodded and left the room. "Only he was you and you were him and I chose you," she whispered after she was sure he had gone. She had chosen Angel in her dreams, hadn't she? But did it really mean anything?  
  
A/N: Ok review! This story will end soon, so please make me happy and review!!! ^_^ 


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Thanks for the reviews, especially to prettyzelda for reviewing 7 times o.O Please review my fic! ^_^ I accept crticsm... as long as it's constructive criticsm. Meaning don't say "You're fic SUCKS!!! DOWN WITH THE FIC!!!", say "Your fic was repetitive, melancholy, and OOC (out of character)". So please REVIEW!!! It's the little button on the bottom of the page that says "Submit Review". Click there, type in a few words, submit, and then I'm happy. ^_^ Now I shall end my endless babbling of an A/N.  
  
"Buffy, we found some information about your vampire," Giles informed her as she returned downstairs. "He has a magical object, the Orbis Per Auctorita Validus Erubesco, or Orb of Power, Strength, Respect. It makes him better than any being you've faced before. Destroy the Orbis and..."  
"He's gone," she finished.  
"So that should be easy, right?" Willow asked. "I mean all you have to do is get the orb, smash it, and then stake him."  
"It's not that simple, Willow," Giles said. "He'll have numberous followers, more than usual because of the erbesco part of the orbis. Respect. Vampires will flock to die for him. And he'll have it guarded by many of his followers and other demons. Plus, there's a ritual you must perform to destroy the orbis. Otherwise it'll just give him more power."  
"If that would give him more power, wouldn't he have already destroyed it?" Xander asked.  
"He can't destroy it. If he did himself, he'd die. If a good person does, however, than the opposite happens. It's not an evil object, but it is only used by evil and for evil."  
"This is sounding better already," Buffy said. "So first task: get the orb?"  
"No, find the orb. See if you can see who's guarding it and what we'll need to get it. Otherwise it'll kill you again, and you can't die anymore."  
"Definitely don't want that happening," Buffy said. The others nodded in agreement.  
"Ok, Spike, Angel, Willow, Xander, you guys come with me. Anya and Tara can help Giles with researching the orbis and the vampire some more."  
"What do I get to do?" Dawn asked from the top of the stairs.  
"Nothing," Buffy said. "You stay here and rest. You'll have nothing to do with this. Let's go."  
  
"Buffy."  
"Spike."  
"Can we talk?"  
"What is with you guys today?! All you want is talk, talk, talk!" Buffy exclaimed.  
"You said 'Angel' when you awoke. And you hugged him. And then you left. You ignored me completely."  
"I had just awoken from the dead, ok Spike. I'm sorry if you were not the first thing that popped into my head!" Buffy said.  
"But Angel was."  
"He was haunting my dreams with you! Both of you were crowding around me and everything just got confusing!"  
"Yet you didn't say my name."  
"I love you Spike, really I do."  
"All right. If you say so," Spike said. The two caught up with the others and walked into the night.  
  
"That's it, there." Buffy pointed towards the glowing sphere that hovered in the center of the cave. They had been searching every hot Demon and Vampire spot in Sunnydale, but they had finally found the caves where the vampire and his fellowship were hiding out.  
"No one's guarding it," Willow said, confused.  
"No, they're all hiding, waiting to do a surprise attack," Angel said. "Waiting for us."  
"Wrong," a voice said from behind. "There's just me, and I've already found you. And now, I'm going to kill you."  
"We outnumber you, you fool," Spike said.  
"The only one I plan to kill is the Slayer. My followers can kill the rest of you as you try to escape."  
"You're not killing me," Buffy said.  
"Oh, but I already have. This time you won't be coming back."  
"I wouldn't count on that plan. You have no weapons, while I have this handy stake, dying to plunge itself into your heart."  
"Don't be so sure about that," the vampire said, a sword materializing in his hand. He threw it at Buffy's stomach, Buffy too surprised to act.  
"Buffy!" Angel dived in front of her. Buffy braced herself for a searing pain in her stomach, but none came. She opened her eyes to see the sword in Angel's side.  
"Angel," she whispered, racing over to him. A crossbow appeared in the vampire's hand, but Xander creeped behind him and dusted him with a stake.  
Buffy picked Angel up. "Superstrength definitely useful."  
"Hurry you guys, other vamps will be coming soon!" They raced out of the cave, Buffy holding Angel tightly.  
  
Giles inspected the wound.   
"He should be ok," Giles finally concluded. "It missed his organs and heart, just stuck through the side." Buffy sighed in relief. "You should stay put for awhile though."  
"He'll be able to fight again, won't he?" Cordelia asked.  
"He should be fine in a few days, ready to kill vampires and demons once again." Buffy hugged Angel.  
"Thank you," she whispered into his ear.  
"You would have done the same," he replied.  
  
A/N: REVIEW!!! Let's go over this once again. Little button below, says Submit Review. Press it. Type in a few words about my fic, submit, and I'm happy. ^_^ 


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! Please continue reviewing cuz I love reviews. They're so reviewful (don't ask, hehe). ^_^  
  
  
"So we won this battle," Willow said.  
"Not neccessarily. The orbis is still out there," Giles said.  
"Nope, it's right here," Xander said. "I grabbed it before we left."  
"What do we do to destroy it?" Buffy asked.  
"This is the spell. It's written in 4 different languages: Latin, Afrikkan, Albanian, and Bisaya. We say it while 5 of us are in a circle holding hands around a piece of sage burning on a candle. The candle is placed in a small plate put in holy water."  
"Well that's not complicated," Xander said. "Who says the spell?"  
"Me, Giles, Xander, Willow, and Dawn," Buffy said.  
"Really?" Dawn squealed. "I get to be apart of this?"  
"Yes," Buffy said. "But careful!"  
  
The set the candle in the holy water and burned the sage in the candle as they assembled into a circle around the items.  
"Repeat after me," Giles began. "Orbis per Auctorita Validus Erubesco, verplig wei se gaaf, mag wie se soort, shpartalloj rreth, bie page, hunong dautan kana gihimo tutok human sa!"  
The recited the spell and the power flow out of the orbis.  
"What did we just say?" Dawn asked curiously.  
"Roughly translated," Giles said, "Orb of power, strenght, respect, force of good, strength of kind, destroy the orb, bring peace, defeat the evil that was sought." They looked onto the shards of the orb that had burst.  
  
Buffy applied the cool cloth to Angel. He winced at the pain.  
"Oh I'm so sorry," she said worriedly. "Are you ok?"  
"Being sent to hell hurt," he said. "This is nothing." Buffy smiled sadly.  
"Sorry about that..." she began.  
"No, it's ok. You've apologized before. You did the right thing."  
"I always felt guilty about it though," Buffy said.  
"No, forget about it."  
"Thanks for saving me," Buffy said, changing the topic.  
"I told you already, you would have done the same."  
"I wouldn't have had the reflexes or courage to do it."  
"You would have. You can do anything," Angel said.  
"I can only do so much," Buffy said.  
"What you can do is enough. I didn't fall in love with you because I thought you were superwoman," he said. Buffy backed away hesitantly.  
"Angel, stop," she said with pain in her voice. He stroked her hair.  
"What do you mean?"  
"Don't talk about it."  
"That I loved you? That I still do?" he asked.  
"I can't love you. Everything always goes wrong. It hurts being with you."  
"It hurts more being without you."  
  
"So what were you and Angel getting all snuggly about?" Spike asked Buffy later, after she had left Angel alone to rest.  
"What? That was nothing. I was just thanking him for saving me," she said.  
"You still love him don't you?" he asked.  
"Spike, you're the only one for me."  
"He still loves you." She looked down.  
"I know."  
"Who will you chose? Can you even chose?"  
"Why do I have to chose?!" she exclaimed. "I'm already with you!"  
"But I can't be with you knowing you love Angel more."  
"I'll always love him, he was my first love. But right now I'm in love with you."  
"You're sure? There's no turning back now," Spike said. She smiled.  
"I'm positive."  
  
"I'm so not sure!" Buffy exclaimed to Willow as they walked throught the cemetary, patrolling.  
"Honey, you have to do what your heart says," Willow said.  
"I don't know what my heart is saying. My heart says Angel, my brain says that it's impossible. My heart says Spike, my brain decides that that's easy."  
"You can't be with Spike just because it's easier," Willow said.  
"I know. I do love him, I just don't know if I love him more than Angel."  
"You have to figure it out," Willow said. "You need to know."  
"Isn't there some kind of spell you could do..." Seeing Willow's face she added, "Ok I know. No magic, and it's wrong. But can't we just be wrong?"  
"Buffy..."  
"Fine fine. I'll decide who I love even if it kills me."   
"There's got to be some way you can decide," Willow said.   
"Angel's always going to be my first love, the one I've always loved. But Spike's so sweet and gentle with me. I know how much I mean to him."  
"Is there any spark between you and Angel?" Willow asked. "I mean, you might love Spike, and you love Angel, but are you *in* love with Angel?" An odd look crossed Buffy's face.  
"I don't know, but I'm going to find out." She raced in the opposite direction, back to her house.  
  
"Angel we're going to solve this once and for all," she said, running into her room where Angel was laying.  
"Buffy what--" Buffy cut him off.  
"No, shh...," she said, pulling him into a kiss. It began to become more and more passionate until Buffy pulled away. She stared into his eyes for a minute before shouting "Damnit!"  
"Buffy?... What are you doing?" Angel asked. "I mean that was one hell of a kiss, but... I'm confused."  
"That's the problem!" Buffy exclaimed. "Ugh! Why do you have to be such a great kisser?!" Angel stared at her. "Right, not your fault but still... Why do I still have to be in love with you? Why can't these feelings just go away?" she cried.  
"You still love me?" he asked, beginning to smile.  
"Yes." He began to get closer to her. "But that doesn't mean I'm chosing you. I still love Spike. How can I decide?"  
"Think about it," Angel said. "I'll still be here when you decide." Buffy smiled.  
"Thanks Angel." She kissed him on the forehead and returned back to patrol.  
  
"There you are!" Willow exclaimed. "Where did you rush off to?"  
"I had to see Angel," she said quietly.  
"I knew it! You're back with Angel!"  
"No, no. I just kissed him, that's all." Willow stared at Buffy, waiting for more.  
"Hello? Details! What happened?"  
"I went to see if there was a spark. If I was in love with him."  
"Are you?"  
"Yes. But that doesn't help. I still love Spike," Buffy said.  
"But it's Angel. You know, Angel, the guy you'd still be with if he hadn't left you. The guy you loved more than anyone in the world? That Angel."  
"I'm familiar with his good points," Buffy said, "but he broke up with me for good reasons. He left me because..."  
"It was the easy thing to do," Willow finished.  
"It was the right thing to do," Buffy corrected.  
"No, it was the logical and sensible thing to do. It wasn't what you wanted." They sat on a bench and stared up at the stars for awhile, just thinking.  
"You think you know, what you are, what's to come. You haven't even begun," Willow whispered. Buffy looked at her, startled.  
"Wh-what was that?" she asked.  
"Just something Tara said once. I just thought it fit here." Willow continued to stare at the sky, but Buffy stared out in front of her, at the gravestone that was shining out at her.  
  
BUFFY ANNE SUMMERS  
1981-2001  
BELOVED SISTER  
DEVOTED FRIEND  
SHE SAVED THE WORLD  
A LOT  
  
'You think you know, what you are, what's to come. You haven't even begun.' The words continued to ring through her head as she went through them. 'You think you know, what you are.'  
  
I thought I knew who I was, she thought, until Angel. With Angel, I never knew who I was or who he was, all I knew is that we were together so things were ok. With Spike I always know who I am. Things never change.   
  
'You think you know.... what's to come.'  
  
I thought I know what would happen but when I met Angel everything changed. Everday something new. With Spike it's all the same. I know what to expect.  
  
'You haven't even begun.'  
  
Buffy stood up.  
"Hey, where are you going?" Willow asked.  
"I know what I have to do," she said, walking back towards her house.  
  
A/N: Mwhahaha... cliffhanger. Though you probably all know what will happen. Anyways, last chapter will be posted tomorrow because I really don't want this fic to end. I'm dragging out the end as far as I can. ^_^ I'm ebil. Anyways, click 'Click here to submit review', review my fic, press the next button that says 'review fic' and then I'm happy! If you don't understand that, what I'm asking you to do is REVIEW MY FIC!!!! ^-^ 


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: *Sniff sniff* Well the end is near... or now... NO DON'T CRY!!! I'll be strong for both of us!!! ;_; I CAN'T DO IT!!! ...Ahem sorry. I get over emotional over my fics. Well, this is the last chapter. I hope you had a good time reading it as I had a great time writing it. BUT DON'T WORRY! More fics of mine to come! In fact, I'm starting 2 new fics at once! They're already up! Falling is the first one, it's not a crossover though. Regret is the second one, which is newly... well new. And it will be a crossover, though it's more focused on Angel (the show) then Buffy (the show, not the character). Anyways, I've been prolonging this enough. It's inevitable... is that how that's spelled? Anyways, as the fic starts it must die too. But if you enjoyed this fic (and are tired of this A/N) go read my other fics... AND REVIEW!!! So... on to the end... ;_;  
  
  
  
"Spike," Buffy said softly.  
"I've been waiting for you to come," he said. "Now you're going to tell me who you chose and I can get on with the celebrating or crying."  
"How did you know?" Buffy asked.  
"How could I not? Angel comes, he cares for you more than it seems he ever has, and I'm supposed to be your one and only? I knew it had to come sometime, you choosing. I just never thought this soon."  
"Spike..." Buffy said sadly. "You're a great guy it's just..."  
"You've always loved Angel more than anyone," Spike finished for her. Buffy looked down.  
"It's ok pet. I don't cry. I only cry upon the things that matter." Buffy smiled, wiping a tear from his eye.  
"So what do I know?" he said dryly. "It's been great. And if you ever need me like you've needed me before well..." he raised an eyebrow, "I'll always be right here."  
"Oh Spike," Buffy said laughing. She'd miss him making her laugh like that. But she had made the right decision. Now all she had to do was tell the Angel.  
  
"Buffy..." Angel said, cautiously.  
"Don't worry, I'm not here to kiss you passionately and then run away."   
"Then why are you here?" he asked. Buffy sat on the edge of her bed. How exactly could she tell him that he was the only one for her? Angel stared intently at Buffy. He pulled back her hair.  
"Buffy, what did you come here for?" Buffy stared back into Angel's eyes and suddenly pulled him into a very deep kiss.  
"I guess I lied," she said, after the kiss had ended.  
"But this time you're not running away," Angel said smiling.  
"Angel, you're always the one for me. I can't believe I actually had to think about it, how to choose between you and Spike. You're always going to be my first and only true love. You're everything I think of, everything to me. You're the reason I haven't stopped slaying. I love you so much." She started to go on, but Angel kissed her lightly.   
"Shh...," he said. "I know. You're the same as me. Whenever I look to tomorrow, all I see is you. All I want is you, even in the past years we've been apart. When I heard you died, I almost died myself. I almost wanted to kill myself. I couldn't think or breathe. But hearing you call my name, that made everything better. Seeing your smile, hearing your voice, touching your hand, all these meaningless things mean the world to me. I couldn't have imagined leaving here without you. I never would have." Buffy smiled, joyous tears pouring out of her eyes.  
  
Spike lay in his crypt, staring at the ceiling. She had chosen Angel, just like he knew she always would have. It just came sooner than he expected, sooner than he hoped. He wanted longer with her. But being with her for even a second was better than not having her at all. Tears fell from his eyes. He tried to stop, but that just made the tears fall harder. Buffy was his, not Angel's. Angel had had his chance. But knew that Buffy would alwyas choose Angel, even if they had had hundereds of chances. Spike turned over, crumpled into a small ball.  
"Why me?" he shouted. "Why is it always me?!"  
  
Buffy lay in Angel's arms resting. He was hers, all hers. She glanced at the Claddagh ring, the heart pointed the opposite way than how it had been and saw Angel's the same. She smiled at his angelic face and kissed his nose. His eyes opened slowly and he smiled at her face. He kissed her and they went back to the way as it had been before. Her being all his, in his arms, forever.  
  
They hadn't even begun.  
  
  
A/N: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! IT'S OVER!!! Ok, how bout I kill her again? Maybe then it can last longer! But I know better. This fic is done ;_;. I do have more on the way though! They both have one chapter each. Actually, Regret only has a short prolouge so far because I haven't had time to work on it much. But please enjoy those fics and review them too. ^_^ 


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